Tagged: family

Why is this a story? Open Letter for Francesa and Esiason

Today’s sports news hosts a story about WFAN broadcaster, Mike Francesa, and former NFL quarterback Boomer Esiason taking issue with the Mets second baseman Daniel Murphy for using his CBA 1-3 day paternity leave. 

Dear Mike & Boomer:

The most magical memory I have of my three children’s deliveries is not their precious faces, or their soft gentle coos.  No in fact, it’s quite the opposite.  I stand in awe that my body could create, host and deliver another human into the world.

Pregnancy is a beautiful opportunity many families enjoy.  I have had the privilege of three full-term deliveries.  Each is special and hard in its own way.

But, I take offense at your reported lack of compassion for the Murphy family for several reasons.

1) The simple idea that anything would come before family.  Baseball is a game that some men have the opportunity to play professionally.  It isn’t war, and it isn’t heroic.  Nothing trumps family, no matter how many zeros or contracts are attached to the salary.

2) Each of you lack the basic anatomy to describe why a woman might need or want her husband around following a delivery.  Just as I can not tell you how to best get through a prostrate exam, you cannot and should not comment on how or why a family might feel it best to support a woman who’s just given birth.  I for one will just state, that the days after my three deliveries were nothing but a blur, not to mention how incredibly difficult it was to just get up and “feed the baby.”  Regardless of family support, my husband and I both decided to become parents.  His support during the first couple of months was critical to our family’s success.  His contribution to the process did not end with conception.

3) Regardless of your own family choices, you have no room to single out a particular family, in the national media.  By singling out the Murphy family, you’ve done more to cause chaos and uproar than any national conversation on women’s rights could ever do.  You both singled the Murphy family out  during what should be one of the happiest times of their life.

4) Baseball’s season is 162 games.  Murphy’s paternity leave removed him from only 2% of the regular season games.  Rarely, if ever do three games determine whether or not a team makes the playoffs.  And, if they do, it would unfair to blame it all on one player.  Murphy started 155 games last year, with 78 RBI, hitting 13 home runs, and a .286 batting average.  He’s a decent player, but it’s not likely to sway an entire season.

5) Both of your comments make the assumption that the birth of a child is a common, everyday occurrence.  It might have been for you and your families, but for some, the birth of a child is a lifetime of prayer, hope and faith.  It is something many families haven’t had the chance to experience.  Maybe your individual responses are at the heart of what’s wrong with our culture.  We simply fail to value life.

In short, back off.  Until your ovaries, cervix, and vagina are installed, and one of you is carrying Daniel Murphy’s child (which might just actually might be one of the best reality TV shows ever pitched), you have little to no opinion in what goes on inside the Murphy family.  Your comments helped create a national news story about a non-issue.

No gimmicks.  No c-sections because of a game.  No story.

Your Lenten Fast?

As a Methbyterian (Methodist/Presbyterian), I am pretty comfortable with the idea of Lent.
 
 The 40 days prior to Easter is called Lent. These days are set aside by many Christians as a time to prepare for the sacrifice of the perfect offering. Forty days is a big deal in the Bible.
 
 Most people fast during Lent. The basic idea of fasting is to abstain from something as a sacrifice. For some, they fast from food or certain foods, or from certain luxuries. I know of one who will spend lent working on a more positive language tone. Whatever your fast looks like, it’s typically a time to refocus on God’s truth in our lives.
 
 So today as I get my ashes, I’ll be focusing on preparing my heart for Maundy Thursday, Good Friday and Easter Sunday. But I will also be working on cleaning out my body!
 
 I’ll be giving up sweets as my fast. By sweets, i mostly mean the things I now crave: candy bars and cokes. It’s all in an effort to focus back on what matters. Some will say, “That’s just a weight loss thing.” Yes but it’s also something that helps me focus on what’s important in my life. I believe as I regain control over this, I’ll see my control come back in other areas as well.
 
 I tend to have an obsessive personality. Meaning, I can get pretty laser beam focused on a project. When that focus wanes, it might as well disappear. My faith walk and health walk have both slipped and it’s time to center back on them.
 
 So, I’ll be focusing on getting my brain back into devotionals. With a crazy life, it’s challenging, but, it has to happen. I can’t live without the big guy’s guidance. And, I’ll quit trying to self-medicate with sweets.
 
 So, do you celebrate Lent? If so, what is your fast?
 
 
 – I have fat fingers. Posted using BlogPress from my iPhone

It’s not about the cookie

I have spent a lot of time hearing, “Hello, would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?” this month.
 Our daughter Madz has a goal to sell as many as Girl Scout cookies as she can. Okay, technically, she wants to sell 2,000, but I’ve curbed that number to, whatever we can manage.
 But, she sells, not me.
 I am transportation, management, supply and training. She’s the sales force.
 I know some parents find it easier to just take the sheet or cookies to work/church and sell for their daughter.
 Yeah, that would take less time and energy. And I wouldn’t have spent countless hours during the weekends sitting outside of businesses or in my car while she asked, “Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?”


And I probably wouldn’t have to sit by this smelly trash can.
 But while sit here with the wafting remains of whatever that is, she’s getting told:
 “No.”
 “No, thank you.”
 “{silence}”
 “Yes, when I leave.”
 “Do you have…”
 Some people are really nice and reaffirm much of what I love about living here. Others, well, they probably had a bad day and deserve some grace. Even if it is hard for me to give them.
 But, I’ve learned it’s not about the cookies.


Here’s what it’s really about:
 
 Watching your daughter learn to make change and having them count it back to her customer.
 
 Watching her ask for an additional sale when someone hands her a $10 or $20, and have the people actually agree to her sales tactic.
 
 Helping her learn to visit with someone with a disability.
 
 Watching her organize.
 Interacting with her as she asks me to do a specific task to help her organize.
 
 Watching her interact and learn to make small talk.
 
 Watching her learn to multi-task as she restocks her table and sells cookies.
 
 Helping her meet people who are different and who have different life stories.
 
 Helping her respond positively, no matter what she’s heard in response to her request.
 
 Hearing her answer questions posed to her.
 
 The real truth:
 It’s about spending countless hours with your girl, watching her grow and mature.
 
 That’s my take-away.
 
 So, yes, it’s easier for me to do it. But, what would we both miss if I did?
 
 And, besides, who’d smell this trash? 😉
 
 – Court

Saturday Family Fun Night

Every Saturday night is reserved at our house. We have a date night.

It’s pretty sacred, simply because it’s part of who we are; we’ve done it so long, that we expect to have time to focus on us and do the fun things we don’t normally do during the hectic week. And besides, the kids always get to do something fun.

The night starts off with homemade pizza. Down to the crust, this is one heck of a meal.

A while back, I started getting the kids involved in the meal prep as well. Since I have a 9, 5, and 4 year old, that varies quite a bit.

My nine year old can do everything from rolling her dough to putting it in the oven (with very active parental help). Then the 4 and 5 year olds can build their own pies, each with toppings they know they’ll eat.

20130706-195616.jpg

20130706-195801.jpg

My five year old loves tomatoes so he decided to try them out on his pizza. My four year old does not like tomatoes. But he adores black olives.

A man after my heart.

They don’t always eat as much as I would like, but they always seem happy to create their own meal.

Jay and I make a pizza with delicious grown-up toppings: roasted zucchini, onions, bell peppers, portabella mushrooms, and anything else we can think of!

20130706-201604.jpg

Last night’s grown-up pizza had sauteed bell pepper, red onion, portabella mushrooms with sausage and pepperoni.

So, a little organization, the right tools, some hands in time, and an oven means Family Fun Night is well under way. And my kids are learning word like pizza peel. I like that. I know I don’t have to have pizza peels or the fancy-smancy pizza cutter, but I like them and they lend an air of ‘authenticity’ to the whole process. And I get to play with dough. I love what yeast does to flour.

After dinner, we do different things. Tonight, since Madeline is out of town, the boys have voted to play games on the PS3. To quote the 5 year old,

Dad, we have to play this while mom’s gone. She never let’s us play Star Wars.

I’ll have you know I absolutely adore playing Lego Star Wars. I Iove being Princess Leia. It’s the one place in the world where I can dress like this:

and go around yelling, “Scruffy Looking Nerfherder” or “I’d rather kiss a Wookie.”

But I digress.

Some Family Fun Nights are done with everyone enjoying the same activity (watching a movie, going to do/see something in town, etc.) and some are with everyone doing their own favorite thing here at the house. There’s no rhyme or reason – I just try to have a night where we can all relax.

We do these now because we know there will be a time when our kids are out and about and Family Fun Night will be one of those, “Hey, remember when…” moments. I’m cool with that as long as they have something good to remember!

What’s your favorite family fun idea? Does it have a meal to go with it? I’d love to hear your ideas!

Here is a link to our Family Fun Night Pizza Dough (or at least the latest version).

Preschool agony

Just because it’s summer and I’m off for a couple of weeks doesn’t mean the learning has stopped.

I’m the meanest mom ever.

I digress.

John Alan wanted to work on his letters. But we found his letter practice sheets like this:
20130628-151511.jpg
Since these are laminated sheets, they don’t totally act like dry erase when left on – forever.

So it was either a lot of elbow grease or try a solvent.

Alcohol to the rescue!

Although drinking alcohol sounded more fun than trying to rescue a few pages I opted for rubbing alcohol on the page with a minimum of elbow grease. 20130628-151934.jpg
They turned out well and didn’t take forever!

Here’s to rubbing alcohol!

Cranky.

Let’s just go with tonight didn’t turn out as good as I’d hope it would.

Since we’re taking some time off this weekend, I’m trying to make sure we come home to a decent home. You know, clean kitchen, toilets, sheets.

Much of today was spent on getting ready or cleaning for the trip.

I was already tired and the kids were cranky as I decided it was time to go do my walk ‘thang’ for the night. To give Jay some time alone, I took the boys with me in the jogging stroller. They were happy to go, and since it was so close to their bedtime I knew it would calm them down.

I got them loaded up and realized I hadn’t changed bras for the run. Now, if you’ve been with me a while, you know that I’ve had issues with undergarments. So instead of making my boys ticked I opted to forgo running and just walk. That wasn’t what I was looking forward to, but, I’m sure my knees are excited.

So the last ‘run’ scheduled I decided to tempt fate and just see what ol’ Victoria could stand from the twins. It wasn’t Victoria who disappointed me – it was the jogging stroller.

There’s a part of a Thomas & Friends video (Misty Island) where Thomas has to go across the Shake Shake Bridge.

As I tried to start running the front wheel shook uncontrollably. My boys loved it, but it drove me crazy.

Not what I expected from today.

I did twenty minutes and just over 1 mile.

Here’s hoping for a better time tomorrow.

Date: 06/28/2011
Type: Walk
Distance: 1.07 miles
Time: 0 hr 22 min 06 secs
Average pace: 20:40 min/miles
Route: Route – 2011-06-28
Route link: http://www.logyourrun.com/showroute/d15KavHLs1MMx5
Calories: 176